day three

The bet is still on and yes, technically I owe 2 entries.

But I’ve been enjoying the holiday.

You know…

…a sleepy morning.

…a good ass movie.

…a fucking full court press from the Nerd Terds!

ARGH! I guess there was a hole in my sheild!

Yahoo mail:

Date:
Sat, 26 Nov 2005 13:26:00 -0800

From:
Wil

To:
Annie

CC:
Shane

Subject:
Ahem. The nerds are displeased

…wil wheaton writes:

Dear Blog,

According to my atomic-powered super calendar, which is accurate to a
thousandth of a nanosecond, and works in both conventional and hyper
time, Jesus' Favorite blog (which is apparently the favorite blog of
the
entire Internets, including me and Shane, and this guy in Nova Scotia
who you don't know, but I've totally met for reals in a chat room)
hasn't been updated in twenty-four hours.

As you can tell, this blogging thing that we nerds do is not as easy as
we make it look, because we are so totally 5d20 times teh awesome.
However, we anxiously await the latest entry to your supermegaawesome
blog, because by comparison, everything else on the Internets sucks
donkey balls.

And before you even ask, yes, I do have a scale which is powered by
solar wind and gremlin magic, which can measure to within
.0000000000003
degrees of accuracy how much things suck donkey balls on the Internets.
I would show you the printouts and punch cards and magnetic tapes, but
you so totally wouldn't understand it.

beep boop bedeep beep beep blahp beep ding!

E&S.

W

--------------------------------------------------

Well, well, well King Will-Baka,

Is that so? A mere mortal like myself couldn’t understand your “donkey ball” charts and “gremlin” graphs? Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t go to college in the Degobah system where ‘Humanities for Hobbits’ and ‘Mastering Q-Bert 101’ were pre-requisites. Forgive me. I just went to a REGULAR college where you did stuff like…oh, I don’t know...attend class, drink beer, go to rugby parties and hope you leave with your underpants on.

Wait, did you even GO to school…or did you have a unicorn come tutor you on your various QUOTE…sets?…UNQUOTE.

Young Wil: “Ooooo…look at me. I’m a movie and TV actor…boo bitty bee bee. I live in a fort where I battle cardassians with my Teddy Ruxbin. My best friend Shane Nickerson is coming over tonight to play truth or dare and ride Tron bikes. I really want to ask Lando Calrissian to the Spring Fling but Princess GAY-A keeps cock blocking me. Fucking Whore. Shane’s going with Boba Fette just to up his cool factor. Plus he can score some juice boxes. Did you know Shane can pound one? Oh man, he's my hero! Come on unicorn. Let’s go to the Northern Quadrant and cover an X-wing fighter with maxi pads. Boo bitty boo boo bippity boppity boo, I’m was in Stand By Me.”

Ok Wil, I’ll admit it. I don’t know what ‘5d20 times’ means. Nor do I know the actual size of a ‘nanosecond.’

But do you know what this means?

Beware of my ghetto photoshop.

Elbow, double bird, and Send.

P.S. And where’s the Duke been? I mean, I know he and Hermione have a thing but I must ask. Are you losing followers?

Comments

[Angie]

Annie,
please keep the blog up - you're hilarious!

[Fabulous Geek]

:-D

and that's all i got to say about that.

[Tina]

Hi Annie, I've beeb reading Wil's blog forever, but this is too good :))

It would be a shame to stop once the week is over...

[Jonas]

:-D

[Rob]

This blog has quickly become a MUST read for me. I only read two other blogs more than once every couple weeks, Wil's and Daniel Negreanu's.

Funniest stuff I've ever read in a blog.

[Rook]

Quick, someone call 911, Wil is bleeding all over the place.

My. God! It is a mess. Will Wil be able to be reassembled [music theme="6 Million Dollar Man"] and come back to beee-itch slap Annie into nerd submission? Will Shane ever return after riding off into the sunset.... oh, wait, that's an old movie. Sorry.

Anyway, Dammn Girl. Be nice to the poor nerds. Seriously, someone could get hurt.

[Khalil A. Cassimally]

Ok, one word: this blog is so cool.

Maybe more than a word, but man, I'm a fan.

[M. Douglas Wray]

Whoa there girly, ease up on the Wheat-meister, you're givin him rug burns! LOL!!

Superb style, but perhaps a smidge less cough syrup?

May the farce be witcha.
peachout

[ANC]

yup, you're kickin' the king troll's butt all the way back to narnia. and his little dog too.

really, keep it up. your writing is a pleasure to read.

and I wish this thing didn't publish my email.

[flenser]

Nice entry, wtg. But...

Am I the only one who read the first few lines too fast and got no content but

"sleepy... good... ass... fucking..."

Beware the hidden messages that arise from text formatting? (heh)

[Steven P]

This blog is great, Annie. It's hilarious to see Wil's better half a work. I hope you continue past a week!

[Heidi]

Flenser, I agree. Beware the pitfalls of skimming.

Steven P, et al.
Annie = Wil's friend
Anne = Wil's wife

Not the same person.

[SandieK]

Yep, please keep it going past the week mark! Please??
I really dont want to have wasted bookmark space. I take my bookmark spots very seriously, and well, when I have to delete a bookmark, its considered A Bad Thing.
Keep it up! This is awesome!

[claire]

Sertich=3
King and Duke Dicks=0

Nice to see a blog devoted so whole-heartedly to ass-kicking.

[LolaGabanna]

You are the coolest thing EVAH! This is absolutely hilarious. Please, please, PLEASE keep it up after the week is over. Please? I love the verbal teabagging you're giving these guys.

[Skan]

Please. Do. Not. Stop.

[snowchyld]

choking down the tears
this is so goddamn funny
our favourite too

[Holy Jeebus]

While I, too, enjoy this witty repartee, I also note that Wil is practically force-feeding Annie mega-doses of hyper-dweeb with which to work. Obviously, Annie is merely a transformational engine: Funny Geek-Dweeb-Nerd Garbage In, Vituperative Witty anti-Geek-Dweeb-Nerd Garbage Out.

Annie will not have proven herself as a true blogger until she can spontaneously generate tales of her dozen cats, while living in seclusion with naught but keyboard and silicon glow to connect her to the real world from which she is hopelessly separated because of her vastly superior feminine intelligence in this man's world.

[ShaneSerack]

Elbow, double bird, and Send.

*cough*
*sputter*
*choke*

LolaGabanna nailed that description....verbal tea-bagging.

Mmm yes, must go on past 5 days. Wil shall never make you another bet so long as he remembers this, so I think it's your duty to make it so he can never forget.

[Naila Jinnah]

LOL!!

That's amazing!!! So funny, so (probably) accurate description.

And dudette, I'd sooo love to have a unicorn as a teacher... well, not really. But it would give me something to do in class...

[phedrang]

well, using an email from Wil as half your entry is sort of cheating so Holy Jeebus is kind of right.

It doesn't make it any less funny though.

And as for the "verbal tea-bagging" - they keep using that word but I don't think they know what it means...

[Cherry Indigo]

I agree with those who are anxious to see what else you do, sans Wil and Shane dueling….we wouldn’t want you to become Wil’s blog-hag.

But don’t throw away the nerd fodder altogether because it’s too damn funny!!

[Trann]

Hmm, no one's commented yet on 5d20? Amazing...

I'd do so myself but the "R" rating in my Geek Code wouldn't compare to Baron von Wilmeister's so I leave it up to him to attack this particular gazebo.

[erin12]

Where is day four? I'm going to stop checking this blog, and therefore you will cease to exist. Isn't that how blogs work?

[Steffie]

This is Steffie, Annie's sister...the brunette in the picture up on the right hand side, holding Jesus' Favorite precious hand. Yes, I know, I was never "Jesus' FAVORITE" but you'll have to read MY blog to get THAT story (wah wah) Although I'm proud of her trashing abilities, I'm glad Wil and Shane get a taste of WHAT I HAD AS A KID, growing up in her shadow sucked.

But really, I've had a blog for months and no ones ever read MY BLOG.
"Oh look at me, I'm Annie and I probably have over a million hits and I just started to BLOG." The counter on my blog has one hit, my dad, and he just commented that I should be more like Jesus' Favorite. But you'll have to read MY blog to get THAT story (wah wah). I mean, my sister didn't even know what a blog was until the guys made a bet with her. I tried so hard..."Annie, it's really cool, seriously, you should have your own blog." "No Steffie, that's only for nerds." So, that's the story of my life...thank GOD I have found some solace with the nerds. Playing second fiddle to Jesus' Favorite sucked. But you'll have to read MY BLOG TO GET THAT STORY. WAH FUCKING WAH.